I want to talk to all my mom friends today. I know we’ve all dealt with this – including myself. And, I think it’s one of the biggest struggles that moms in our culture deal with today. There is one thing that we can all stop doing today, right now, to make ourselves better moms. It is to stop feeling guilty. Stop. Just stop. We are human. We make mistakes. We want time to ourselves. We like spending time with our friends. Of course we love our children. We love being a mom and we are so blessed to have a wonderful family. We all know that. It’s OKAY to do things for us. To buy clothes for us. To tell our kids no or wait. We are allowed to send a text while our kids are playing on the playground. We are allowed to put a show on for our kids so we can jump in the shower. Not every single second of the day is going to be us smiling in awe at our children. It’s just not. Get over it.
For a long time I completely neglected myself thinking I was doing the best for our family, but it ended up back-firing. This also led to me being very critical and judgmental, but I’ll save that for another post… By neglecting myself, I lost of piece of myself and in turn our whole family suffered. I actually used to be proud of the fact that my husband and I hadn’t gone on a date in months. WRONG. It’s ok for us to do things that we like. In fact it’s necessary. I’ll never forget that one of the first questions my counselor ever asked me was “what do you do for fun?” And guess what. I had no response. None. Because I stopped doing fun things. I was all business all the time. Being productive. Making sacrifices for my kids. Being a mom. I was a mom. All. The. time. And I wasn’t being a wife, a friend, a woman. Ever.
Mom guilt is becoming a major problem in our culture. So, let’s change that. Go do your thing. Own your decisions. Have fun. Step out of your mommy role. There is no question that you love your kids, so don’t second guess yourself. Of course, I am not saying neglect your kids or ignore your kids. Never. As moms we are responsible for providing our children with food, clothing and shelter. I am sure you are doing that, and then some. So, stop feeling guilty for being yourself.
All 3 of my daughters are in school for the next 2.5 hours and I am home alone. And, I can tell you right now… I am not going to be making blueberry scones and I am not going to be scrubing the bathroom. I am going to enjoy my free time for a little bit. And, I am NOT going to feel guilty about that!
My question for you is, do you feel guilty when you take time for yourself? And, why?