Whenever a Hallmark Holiday rolls around, the word disappointment starts trending in the social media feeds.
There is so much hype before holidays like Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day, even birthdays, and this buzz gets our expectations high.
Every advertisement is telling us that we are going to be celebrated in a huge way. There are endless cute stuffed animals, greeting cards, and trinkets available for our families to purchase in order to show their appreciation for us.
And, we are inundated with the preconception that this year it’s gonna be HUGE.
But, then the holiday rolls around and our high expectations oftentimes don’t line up with reality. And then, we deal with disappointment.
So, if you were disappointed last time, chances are that’s going to happen again, and again, and again. Unless you change something.
What do you change?
Well, you have to be absolutely 100% crystal clear on what you are expecting.
Let your family/kids/spouse know exactly what you want for Mother’s Day, or your birthday, or Valentine’s Day. Or, even a regular Friday night.
As much as we’d hope that others can read our minds, they can’t. And, if you were really hoping for a handmade card and your husband gives you breakfast in bed instead, you are going to end up disappointed. Both are great gifts, but in order for you to feel appreciated, your expectations need to be met.
Do you find that oftentimes you feel disappointed after special occasions such as Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day and your birthday?
Let me take it even further. Do you feel under-appreciated? Or, maybe you feel like you do so much for others and they just don’t reciprocate?
If you were disappointed last year, that will probably happen again this year. If you were let down last time, it will likely happen again next time.
Unless you change something.
One thing we must not forget is that people are predictable.
And, let me be the first to admit that I had to take a good deal of time to learn this. Oftentimes I would say I wasn’t expecting anything big, or that I didn’t care about my birthday, but in reality, I wanted to be recognized and appreciated. I think we all do.
But, saying one thing and thinking another doesn’t usually work out.
My family can’t read my mind. I’ve learned to be clear with my expectations instead of wishing and hoping that someone would know what I was thinking.
Because we all feel appreciation in different ways. Personally, I love gifts. Receiving gifts is my “love language.” So, I have made sure that my husband knows this. He could go out of his way to make me a nice dinner and clean the whole house, but it wouldn’t really matter to me. However, if he surprises me by even just bringing home a leftover piece of cake from his office I feel so appreciated. Now that he understands this, he makes an effort to surprise me with little gifts from time to time.
Teach your family and friends how to love you best. They want to do that.
To prevent disappointment, my best piece of advice is to make sure that your kids/spouse/whoever know EXACTLY what you are expecting. It’s okay to tell them. It’s okay to want to be celebrated.
Don’t apologize for the things that make you feel happy and don’t downplay your need to feel loved.
You are worth it. <3
PS – Have you taken the Brave & Bold Challenge yet? Your life is waiting.