It wasn’t that long ago that I considered myself indecisive. I didn’t think this was a bad trait to have. I would go with the flow, keep opinions to myself, and never rock the boat.
But, eventually my life got to the point where I was so indecisive I couldn’t even make a decision about what to make for dinner. Literally. And, when you are a stay at home mom with 3 children and a husband, this is a big problem.
Now I realize that what I was actually doing was pushing responsibility off of myself. Because if I made a mistake, or a bad decision, well it couldn’t be considered my fault if I never made the decision in the first place.
Many times, the reason we don’t want to make a decision is because we don’t want anyone to be upset with us, or judge us, for choosing something that might oppose another person’s opinion. We want to keep the peace. But, this is not necessarily a good thing. Sometimes we need to disagree with others. And, most of the time, they still like us for who we are. In fact, they might even like us better because we have an opinion.
Don’t be afraid to disagree with someone. Having a differing opinion from someone is much better than being neutral about everything. Often, the reason we hold our opinions in is because of fear. But, usually it is an irrational fear.
Make your decisions with confidence. That doesn’t mean to ignore the opinions of others. But if you measure your decisions against truth, kindness, and justice, than you can be confident in your viewpoint.
Today, other people’s (unsolicited) opinions about who I am, what I do, and decisions I make have little to no affect on me. I just don’t care anymore. Besides, I am too busy and focused on who I am trying to help to really even notice if someone doesn’t like what I am doing.
I’ve been able to shed my perfectionistic ways – to an extent.
And, on the other side of the coin, I find that with a new found confidence people actually try and get me to make their decisions for them now! Go figure.
One of the best ways to help someone is to let them make decisions for themselves and be accountable for the decisions that they’ve made. Don’t go rescuing someone who makes the same mistakes over and over again because you feel bad for them.
This doesn’t mean that you can make decisions without hearing the opinions of others. And, it certainly doesn’t mean that you don’t admit when you are wrong. It simply means that you are confident in who YOU are, without judging those who are different from you. Be confident. Be secure. Be empowered!
Do you consider yourself a people-pleaser? Why are you afraid to disagree with others? Do you feel like you need to be the one to keep the peace? You may have some work to do.
Check out my video for more, and to get an update on the Renew program!! So much great feedback already, and most importantly, moms taking ACTION!!
PS – Do you find yourself being a mom and nothing else? Have you stopped being a wife, friend, sister, woman, daughter? This caused my confidence to plummet, and it is one of the reasons that I developed Renew. You can now purchase one week at a time if you don’t want to commit to the full program. Check out Renew by Week here. We’d love to have you join us!